Leftie or Rightie

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

A possible leftie?

Ayanna seems to favor her left hand over her right for things like eating, drawing and playing. This dominant hand is becoming increasingly more consistent. Perhaps before long we will find out for sure.

Is it too soon to say? Whenever we try out the following exercise - holding out a toy: she reaches for it with her left hand. She also picks up her spoon with her left hand. The dominant hand is usually stronger and has more dexterity.

We've met many people who seem surprised to find Ayanna using her left hand. Most people tend to view this negatively and constantly urge us to change and help her shift her preference from left to right. We've remain steadfast about her choice. Experts say “Don't try to change your child's inborn preference. Forcing a child to use the non dominant hand can create a lot of frustration and expend energy that could be going toward improving skills and learning”. Besides, the hard-wiring of your child's nervous system is at least part of the reason. Forcing them to use their right hand when they're truly a lefty is unlikely to work in the long run and will only confuse them along the way.

Some say we won't be able to determine true right- or left-handedness until they're 2 or 3 years old, when they'll begin to favor the same hand consistently. Some children may be ambidextrous (using both hands equally) until they're 5 or 6, when they finally make a choice. They say hand dominance is greatly influenced by genetics. Only about one in 10 people are left-handed.

Reading

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

Starting young...at 6 months.

Ayanna wakes up to her favourite book each morning, Hey Wake Up! by Sandra Boynton . She falls asleep to Boynton's The Going To Bed Book, Karen Katz's Counting Kisses and her favourite bedtime rhymes. There's even one which Ayanna reads when she's on the potty (Alyssa Satin Capucilli's The Potty Book for Girls).

We've tried to incorporate reading as much as we can from as early as possible. We hope that we've helped Ayanna love reading as much as we do. Reading, after all is fundamental, providing invaluable exposure to language. Teaching your toddler to love reading begins long before they know their A from their Z. The latter which involves teaching a child to recognise letters and sound out words and string words into sentences is a process that will happen in due time when a child is ready.

Here are some ways in which we try to nurture and encourage Ayanna's love for reading-

Selection- we choose books with large, clear, bright and cheerful illustrations with short, simple text. Sometimes we let Ayanna do the choosing.

Persistence – we try to establish a pattern throughout the day – reading when she wakes up, before she sleeps and some reading through the day.

Creativity – we take literary control over some stories by abridging long passages, swap simpler words for those that she doesn't understand.

Interactive- we encourage Ayanna to point out characters in the book, engage her in the illustrations. We've found the touch-and-feel books with flaps and other surprises to be a big hit.

Repetition – our daily bed time stories are Ayanna's favourite especially the nursery rhymes. We've been pleasantly surprised to find that she has memorised some of it.

Of course, most sessions are kept short and brief and are typically enjoyed while being curled up together.

How do you encourage reading in your toddler? What are some of your toddler's favourite books?

My 2-year-old

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

 

Ayanna turned 26-months last week.

I'm giddy with delight just watching her develop in a myriad of areas. New skills are acquired at rapid rates, however, she seems to focus fiercely on her language and physical skills.

Ayanna is able to point to several objects that we name; recognise the names of familiar people, objects and body parts; repeat words she overhears; play make-believe; follow simple instructions; sort objects by shape and colour. Ayanna's vocabulary has since increased and she continues to make 5-6 word sentences.

Her brain like any two-year old is a beehive of activity (for it forms countless new neural connections that help them understand the whats, whys, and hows of the world.). These early learners need to be encouraged to expand their skills through a wide array of playthings; to explore their environment, to stimulate their senses with musical and tactile toys; to read.

Happy Deepavali

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

 

Deepavali greetings to all....

We head to the beach tomorrow...

See yall soon!

:)

 

A fear...

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

 

Our recent trip to the doctors went surprisingly well – which was unexpected. We dread the visits just as much as Ayanna does. Every visit typically ends in screaming and crying. This time round, except for crying due to pain, Ayanna was mostly cheery and playful. I'm not exactly sure when Ayanna developed a fear of doctors. While her own pediatrician is superb with kids (which helps a lot), others we've encountered have not been as patient, further aggravating the situation. Other doctors have resorted to scare tactics ( i.e. If you do not stop crying you'll have to stay with me when mummy leaves) to calm our terrified toddler, which only increases the crying and deepens the fear.

These particular doctors fail to realise that it's normal for a child to be fearful. After all, anxiety is a natural condition that helps us cope with new experiences and protects us from danger. Most fears will fade as toddlers become more secure of themselves and their environment.

As parents we're also learning to better cope with her fears. The last time we tried the following and it seemed to have worked-

1. We acknowledged her fears – we reassured and comforted her, letting her know we understood how it feels to be afraid of something.

2. We explained & explored – we provided her with a simple explanation of what doctors do ( i.e. taking care of people and making them feel better). We informed her of the vaccination and gently explained how the shot may sting/ hurt a little at first, but that it would be over quickly. We kept her focused on something fun that we would do after (such as going to the playground or pool).

3. We role-played – Ayanna and I took turns pretending to be doctor, acting out what happens at the doctor's office.

Does your toddler have a fear of doctors? How do you deal with it?

Vaccination...

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

 

Once Ayanna turned 2, she was given the Hepatitis A vaccination. Two doses are recommended. The second dose is given no sooner than six months after the first dose. Children between the ages of 1 and 2 are recommended to receive the first of two doses of the vaccination.

Hepatitis A is a liver disease caused by the hepatitis A virus, the most common form of viral hepatitis. The virus is mainly spread by oral contact with feces containing the virus. Unclean utensils and shellfish could also be culprits. Hepatitis A usually causes temporary liver inflammation. Most people recover without any long-term liver problems.

Routine vaccination of children is the most effective way to reduce the incidence of hepatitis A. Have you vaccinated your toddler against Hepatitis A?

Is Yours a Happy Toddler - Part II

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

 

Here is another list of guidelines that may help you in your quest to raise a happy child-

Communicate

If you want to know if your child is happy, it's pretty simple – just talk with him. More importantly, listen to what he has to say. Experts say open communication is essential in understanding your child's many moods.

Let them be

It's just as important to allow them to be unhappy. I sometimes find this hard to do cause when Ayanna feels sad, I'm quick to jump in, to try to help her fix her mood. I think I react the way I do fearing that I may have been the reason/ cause for her change in mood. But experts say otherwise - “ Children need to know that it's okay to be unhappy sometimes - it's simply part of life.” If we try to suppress any unhappiness, we may be sending the wrong message that's it's wrong to feel sad. Kids need to be encouraged to experience a wide array of feelings. Encourage them to express their emotions – it helps them get validated and you can talk about it.

Set an example

I try to make a constant effort to show Ayanna a more positive attitude no matter how difficult it can get sometimes. I've learnt from experience that Ayanna is sensitive and can take on my behaviour or moods. However when it comes to expressing my feelings, and negative emotions like anger, sadness I talk to Ayanna about it and why a certain something that she did or happened has caused such a feeling. Sometimes I think she may be too young to absorb it all but she tends to surprise me when she expresses herself in a similar way - “I'm sad there's no dog mummy” (if we were to visit the park, and there's no dog in sight).

Care to share your thoughts on this? How do you raise a happy child – any insights?

Is yours a happy toddler?

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

A happy toddler...

While you're busy disciplining your toddler or attempting to make sense of those tantrums, does the following thought come to mind -

Is my toddler truly happy?

It's a thought that frequently creeps into my mind. How do I raise a happy toddler? Where do I begin? Am I on the right track?

The best predictors of happiness, according to experts, are internal. That's why it is important to help kids develop a set of inner tools they can rely on throughout life. It's reassuring to find out that one does not have to be an expert to impart such strength to a child. Any parent can lay the groundwork for a lifetime of happiness with some patience and flexibility.

First Step - Discovering the signs 
A toddler's emotions have become more complex. His ability to control them is growing stronger. Generally a happy child is one who smiles, plays, socialises and is curious, stimulated. But of course, if you have a naturally shy or introverted child, doesn't mean they're unhappy. Experts say parents have to work hard at reading the signs so as to not miss any major changes in their toddler's behaviour.

Each toddler has his or her way of showing you when they're going through a rough time. Some withdraw, others throw tantrums while others become overly clingy. Get to know your toddler and you'll become better at learning the signs.

I was happy to discover the following guidelines on how to raise a happy child -

FUN!

Your toddler knows what makes her happy – it's you! Be ready to connect with your child; play with them. Play is when children invent, create and daydream. Play creates joy. Join in!

Encourage talent

Happy people are those who have mastered a skill. Therefore, when your child learns something new like catching a ball, he learns to do so from his mistakes, develops persistence and experiences the joy of succeeding because of his own efforts.

Experts want parents to let go - “Let them struggle, figure out things on their own, because it allows them to learn how to cope. Don't try to fix things.”

Your role as a parent is to help them find a solution, not provide it for them. They will learn that no matter what happens, they can find a solution. They bask in the recognition from others for the success of their endeavours. Through the entire exercise, your toddler will discover he has some control over his life.

I find this to be especially true. Ayanna has spent the last week mastering the art of somersaults. I admit at first I was a little anxious about possible injuries, etc. But I gave in and watched her struggle, tumble and eventually succeed. And how immensely satisfied and happy that made her.

Healthy bodies

Plenty of sleep, exercise, and a healthy diet are important to a child's well-being. Just running around outside rather than being cooped up indoors helps children with their moods. I watch Ayanna's face light up whenever we head outdoors and so, I make it a point to take her to the park or playground.

More on this later...

To smack or not to

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

 

As a child, I've experienced my fair share of smacks. As a parent, I choose not to smack as I believe that children refrain from repeating an act mainly out of fear when physical force is used. Instead of differentiating between right and wrong, they only learn to differentiate between what they get smacked for and don't get smacked for.

According to experts, smacking is just not effective. It sets a violent example and may cause injury. Those who are smacked tend to use physical force against their peers. Smacking also denies children the opportunity to learn alternative, less hurtful ways of dealing with anger and frustration. It also represents the abuse of power by 'someone big and powerful' against a very 'small, weak' individual.

Smacking is downright demeaning and humiliating to both parent and child. A child's self-esteem suffers.

Some experts believe that a smack on the hand or the bottom may be necessary in a dangerous situation in order to get an important message across to a child too young to understand words. The idea is not to inflict pain but to quickly call their attention to the seriousness of the situation. Once a toddler shows that they understand what you say, experts say physical force is no longer justifiable even when safety is an issue.

Where do you stand on this matter?

Discipline – A Spoonful of Sugar...

Posted by: Sharmila Rajah Post(s) by this blogger

 

Experts say opt for the win win situation – sometimes it's the road we take and at other times, we opt for less desirable ways to get our toddlers to do what we want them to. I'm guilty – as I stand in the bathroom at the end of the day urging Ayanna to get into her bath, I sometimes resort to threats (i.e. “If you don't take your bath right now, we won't read later”). I'm not proud of it.

Humour usually works well. It can be brought into a variety of disciplinary situations. This evening when Ayanna was refusing to take her bath, Mummy pretended to be a dog giving the orders. It worked but it's not always what comes to mind especially if time is a factor. Using laughable lyrics when Ayanna refuses to dress up helps. We sing “Do you put your shirt on your elbow, on your elbow....” - not only does it get her involved, it generates plenty of giggles. The more outrageous the lyrics the more likely she is to be distracted making anything from shampooing and washing happen without a squabble.

I'm sure Marry Poppins will approve...

How do you handle similar situations?